Sending money to someone who turned out to be a scammer is painful to admit. The hours after you realize what happened matter more than you would think, though, because some payments can still be reversed if you report them fast. Here is what to do, in order.
Act fast: why the first hours matter
Scammers choose payment methods that are hard to trace, and they do it on purpose. Once money moves through a wire transfer, a gift card or crypto, the odds of getting it back drop by the hour. The FTC says your money may already be gone, but it still makes sense to ask whether the company that handled the payment can do anything.
Before you contact anyone, do two things:
- Stop all contact with the person. Do not send more money, even if they describe an emergency, a deadline or a frozen account.
- Save what you have. Screenshot the profile and your conversations, especially anything about money, and list every payment: amount, date, method, and any account names or addresses they gave you.
Speed is the one factor you control. Banks, payment apps and wire companies can only reverse money that has not been passed along yet.
What can and can’t be recovered, by payment type
Every payment method works differently, so your first contact depends on how you paid.
| How you paid | Who to contact first | What to ask for |
|---|---|---|
| Zelle or a bank transfer | Your bank or credit union, right away | Ask them to reverse the payment and refund your money |
| Payment app (Venmo, Cash App, PayPal) | The payment app itself, right away | Ask them to reverse the payment and refund your money |
| Wire transfer (Western Union, MoneyGram) | The wire transfer company | A refund; tell them a scammer tricked you |
| Credit card | Your card issuer, through the app or statement number | A refund of the unauthorized charge |
| Debit card | Your bank or credit union, through the app or statement number | A refund of the unauthorized charge |
| Gift card | The company that issued the card | Ask whether anything can still be done |
| Cryptocurrency | No company to reverse it; report to the IC3 | Tracing depends on the details in your complaint |
Cryptocurrency deserves its own note. It moves directly between users, with no bank or company in the middle, and transfers cannot be undone. There is no business you can appeal to. The records are permanent, though. Every transaction sits on a public ledger called a blockchain, and law enforcement can trace payments across them. That only works if your report includes the crypto addresses, the types and amounts, the transaction hashes, and the dates and times.
Wire transfers: ask for a recall
If you wired money, contact your bank and the bank that may have received the funds. Ask your bank to request a recall of the wire, a formal attempt to pull the money back before it moves further.
Contact the wire transfer company as well, whether that was Western Union, MoneyGram or another provider. Tell them a scammer tricked you and ask for a refund. If your bank is a national bank and its response falls short, you can complain to the Office of the Comptroller of the Currency.
Disputing a charge with your bank or card issuer
If a scammer used your card without authorization, or talked you into paying with one, contact your card issuer through its app or the number on the back of your card. Tell them what happened right away and ask for a refund.
Federal law protects credit card holders from unauthorized use, so do not write the money off without asking. For debit cards, report to your bank or credit union right away and ask for a refund.
Reporting to the FTC and IC3 to build your case
Reversing a payment is one track. Reporting is the other, and it matters even if the money never comes back.
Start with the Federal Trade Commission at ReportFraud.ftc.gov. Investigators use reports to build cases against scammers, and other law enforcement agencies can see them too.
Then file a complaint with the IC3, the FBI’s online reporting center for internet crime. Anyone affected by a cyber-enabled crime can file, including on behalf of someone else. Include the account information, the transaction date and amount, who received the money, how the person contacted you, and how they told you to pay. Leave your Social Security number and date of birth off the form entirely.
A few IC3 quirks worth knowing:
- Save or print your complaint before you close the window. That is the only time you can keep a copy.
- The IC3 does not accept attachments or collect evidence. Keep your originals somewhere safe in case an agency requests them later.
- You will not hear back from the IC3, and a filed complaint cannot be canceled. If you learn something new later, file a new complaint that references the first one.
If you are 60 or older, the Department of Justice’s Elder Justice Hotline can help you file.
Watch out for fake recovery agents
Losing money once makes you a target again. Scammers buy and trade lists of people who have already paid scammers, including names, phone numbers, the type of scam and the amount lost. Then someone reaches out, claiming to be a government agency, a law firm, a consumer group or even the original company offering refunds.
The tell is simple: they want something first. That might be an upfront retainer, processing fee, administrative charge or tax, or your Social Security number and bank details to deposit a refund. Anyone who unexpectedly contacts you and asks for an upfront fee to recover your money is a scammer. So is anyone claiming to be from the FTC itself; the agency will never threaten you, tell you to move money to protect it, or ask you to withdraw cash or buy gold.
Safety note
Scammers also impersonate the IC3 and the FBI. Between December 2023 and February 2025, the FBI received more than 100 reports of people posing as IC3 staff and claiming they had recovered victims’ funds. The IC3 never contacts people by phone, email, social media or forums, never asks for payment to recover money, and never refers victims to companies that charge for recovery.
Protecting your accounts after the loss
Money is not the only thing exposed. If the scammer has your account numbers, passwords or personal details, limiting the damage comes next:
- Ask your bank what steps they recommend, including closing the account or stopping pending transfers.
- If you shared a password, change it from a different device, and change it anywhere else you reused the same one.
- Read your statements for charges you did not make, and report those to your bank or card issuer as unauthorized.
If the person threatened to share private photos or details, that is its own emergency, and getting help should come before paying anyone anything. And if you are second-guessing how the whole thing started, the stories romance scammers tell make the patterns easier to recognize next time.
If all of this feels like too much right now, start with a single phone call to whichever company handled your largest payment, whether that is your bank, the payment app or the card issuer. Ask one question: can this payment be reversed? Everything else can follow from the answer.
Read this next
- Is Your Match Real? How to Check Before You Meet, which covers short checks that catch fake profiles before money or feelings get involved.
- What to Do If Your Dating App Account Is Hacked, useful if the scammer got into your accounts or reused your details.
- Reporting a Dating Scam: Where to Report and What to Include, a deeper walkthrough of building a strong report.
To keep in mind
- Contact the company that handled the payment immediately, because your bank, the payment app or the card issuer can only reverse money that has not been moved on yet.
- Wire transfers, gift cards and crypto are the hardest to recover. Crypto transfers cannot be reversed at all, though law enforcement can trace them on the blockchain.
- Report to the FTC and to the FBI’s IC3, and save or print your IC3 complaint when you file, since that is the only copy you will be able to keep.
- Anyone who contacts you unexpectedly and asks for an upfront fee to recover your money is a scammer, even if they claim to be a government agency or law firm.
- If the scammer has your account details, ask your bank about steps such as closing the account or stopping pending transfers.
Asked often
Can I get my money back after a romance scam?
Sometimes. Payments reported quickly through banks, card issuers or payment apps have the best odds, while wire transfers, gift cards and crypto are much harder. The FTC recommends asking the company that processed the payment whether anything can still be done, no matter how you paid.
Who should I contact first?
The company that handled your largest payment. That is your bank or credit union for Zelle and bank transfers, the payment app itself for Venmo, Cash App or PayPal, or your card issuer for card charges.
Will the IC3 contact me about my complaint?
No. Analysts review complaints and forward them to law enforcement, but the IC3 does not provide status updates. Save or print your complaint when you file, because that is the only copy you will receive.
How do I spot a fake recovery agent?
They contact you first and ask for an upfront fee or your financial details to release a refund. The IC3 never asks for payment to recover funds, and the FTC never tells you to move money to protect it.
This guide is general information, not medical, legal or professional advice. If you’re in danger, call 911. For confidential support, contact the National Domestic Violence Hotline at 1-800-799-7233 or RAINN at 1-800-656-4673.
