Dating again after a divorce means learning a new routine, and money is part of it. App subscriptions, first dates and the small costs that sneak up on you can add real line items to a budget that may already feel strained. The good news: the numbers are more manageable than most people expect, especially once you know where the money actually goes.
The Upfront Costs: Apps and Subscriptions
Most people start with dating apps, and that is where the first money decisions show up. Nearly half of adults 50 and older in a 2025 AARP survey of 300 adults said they had used a dating site within the past three years, so you are in familiar company.
Pricing varies a lot from app to app and between plans. Free tiers let you create a profile and match without paying. Paid subscriptions typically add extras such as seeing who liked you, unlimited messaging or a visibility boost. Costs climb when you commit for a shorter period, buy add-ons like boosts, or forget that most plans auto-renew by default. Our guide to dating app subscriptions covers typical tiers and how to cancel, which is worth reading before you enter a card number anywhere.
What a First Date Actually Costs
The most useful budgeting number comes from a LendingTree survey of 1,281 U.S. adults: respondents reported spending an average of $77 on a first date in 2019. Over a full year, people who were dating spent an average of $697, covering dinners, concerts, museums and everything in between.
That average hides a lot of variation. Men in the survey spent $361 more than women over the year, often because of lingering expectations about who pays. Gen Xers spent $537 more than Gen Z, and Americans generally earn and spend the most between ages 45 and 54, according to Bureau of Labor Statistics data. Many newly single daters fall right into that stretch of life.
| Expense | What the data shows |
|---|---|
| First date | $77 average in 2019 |
| A full year of dating | $697 average in 2019 |
| Entertainment, per household | $3,609 average in 2024 |
| Transportation, per household | $13,318 average in 2024 |
If a first date is coffee or a walk, it costs a fraction of that $77 average. If it is dinner and a movie in a big city, it can run well past it. Where you meet matters more than whether you date at all.
Getting Date-Ready: Wardrobe, Grooming and Haircuts
These costs are real but easy to keep in check. A haircut before you start dating, a few new clothes and grooming products all add up, and none of it is required. The practical move is to decide what you genuinely want to refresh before your first date and buy that once, rather than treating dating as a reason to rebuild your whole closet. Prices for haircuts, clothing and grooming vary widely by city and salon.
Costs People Forget: Parking, Childcare and Time
The date itself is rarely the whole cost. Parking, rideshares, tolls and gas can rival the price of the date, especially if you are driving across town. Transportation averaged $13,318 per household in 2024 and, together with housing, made up over half of household spending, so it is not a category to ignore.
If you have kids, childcare for an evening out can cost more than the date itself, and rates depend heavily on where you live and how long you need coverage. Some divorced parents trade sitting nights with friends or family instead of paying for a sitter. That trade is worth setting up before you start matching, not after.
There is also your time. Messaging and meeting people takes hours, and time off work for a daytime date has a cost too.
When Money From the Divorce Still Lingers
Many people come back to dating while the financial dust is still settling, whether that means a tighter budget, a new home or legal fees still coming due. That is common, and it does not mean you should sit dating out.
One in three adults in the LendingTree survey said they had turned down dates because of money, so financial hesitation is not unusual. Half of men and 48 percent of women said they would tell the truth if asked on a date they could not afford, while 26 percent of men and 19 percent of women said they would put the cost on a credit card instead. Honesty costs less than the interest.
Watch for pressure in either direction: someone who insists you pay more than you can afford, or someone who quickly steers conversations toward your assets or asks for money, is showing you something. Our guide to early red flags covers the patterns that justify walking away, and financial pressure is near the top of the list.
Budgeting for Dating Without Overspending
A simple monthly budget keeps this from ballooning. Decide how many dates you can realistically afford per month, then multiply by the cost of the dates you actually want. Cheap dates are legitimate ones: 76 percent of respondents said they would not mind a date using a coupon or gift certificate, and a homemade picnic or a walk can beat an expensive restaurant.
Good move
Pick first-date venues where you control the tab, like coffee. You can always upgrade to dinner once you know the person is worth it.
A few practical habits:
- Start on free app tiers before paying for anything
- Check cancellation terms before any subscription renews
- Split or alternate paying rather than defaulting to one person
- Track what you actually spend the first month, then adjust
When a connection runs its course, closing it kindly costs nothing but a clear message, and our guide to ending things respectfully walks through how to do it well. Dating after divorce does not have to be expensive to be worthwhile. It just has to fit the budget you actually have.
Read this next
- Dating App Subscriptions: Costs, Auto-Renewal and How to Cancel for what paid tiers cost and how to stop auto-renewal
- First Date Safety: A Practical Checklist for Meeting Someone New for practical steps before and during a first meeting
- Early Red Flags: Pressure, Control and When to Walk Away for spotting financial pressure early
To keep in mind
- Americans who dated in 2019 spent an average of $697 on dates over the year and $77 on a typical first date.
- Dating app pricing varies widely, so check subscription tiers, auto-renewal terms and cancellation steps before you commit.
- One in three adults in a LendingTree survey said they had turned down dates because of money.
- Housing and transportation accounted for over 50 percent of average household spending in 2024, so travel costs for dates add up.
- Setting a monthly dating budget and choosing cheaper first dates keeps spending predictable while you figure things out.
Asked often
How much should I expect to spend on dating after a divorce?
There is no fixed number, but one survey found Americans who dated spent an average of $697 over a year, and $77 on an average first date in 2019. Your own total depends on how often you go out, what you do and whether you pay for app subscriptions.
Do I need a paid dating app subscription to meet people?
No. Most apps offer a free tier, and many people meet matches without paying. Paid tiers usually add features like seeing who liked you, so try the free version first and understand auto-renewal before upgrading.
Is it okay to suggest a cheap first date?
Yes. In a LendingTree survey, 76 percent of respondents said they would not be bothered if a date used a coupon or gift certificate to pay. Coffee, a walk or a picnic can work just as well as a pricey dinner.
What if money from the divorce is still tight?
You are not alone: one in three adults in the same survey said they had turned down dates because of money. Be honest about what you can afford and date less often rather than going into debt.
This guide is general information, not medical, legal or professional advice. If you’re in danger, call 911. For confidential support, contact the National Domestic Violence Hotline at 1-800-799-7233 or RAINN at 1-800-656-4673.
